Leigh-Anne Gilbert - Assessment Blog 4

1. Being a part of Porto was like being suspended in a place of limbo; stuck between the past and the future, the known and the unknown. Every person who entered the space of Porto had this in common – the state of being ‘in-between’. As the creative process moved from the validation stage to the performance stage however, other themes emerged that linked the whole community together. We all entered Porto as individuals coming into and unknown space, but there was a common element of uncertainty amongst us all, and also curiosity. Whether people were fearful of Blake or Nicola’s characters, or sympathetic to them, we were all curious and intrigued by their presence and explored this in different ways.

On some level everybody wanted or needed something. Some characters wanted someone else’s property, for example Richard’s character wanted Mikey’s juggling balls. Some people wanted the attention of others like Amy James always trying to get the attention of Gavin; while other characters needed somebody e.g. Nicola’s character needed Jay, and Amy Hodgkiss’ character needed to help Blake, which in a way was also needed to help herself.

I think a major theme that came through was that of the constant need for reassurance. The fact that we were all entering this place alone and were faced with 37 strangers was daunting. Everybody in their own way had the desire to fit in and this was represented by the ensemble sequences. At the start of the piece, after each person’s individual movements, the majority of the group began doing the same moves – already a sense of unity was being created. The small group of people facing different ways at first resisted being the same, but eventually all conformed to the ways of the community. As the show went on it became clear that even the people who resisted interacting to begin with (myself included), came to realise that to survive in this place you needed the reassurance of someone.

2. As we moved from the drama studio’s to the Arena theatre we were faced with new challenges that we had to overcome. The main issue was with the amount of space. Although there was more floor space in the Arena, we were used to being rather close to one another, particularly in the periphery. With the larger space to work in, it gave us more freedom in our interactions. However, this then posed the problem of the peripheral work becoming too dynamic and detracting focus from the main action. It took some time to adjust to this and to get the balance right. Motionhouse Dance Theatre say that they are “…constantly experimenting with the performance environment” (http://www.motionhouse.co.uk/about.htm) and to an extent this is what we had to do when we got into the Arena Theatre. We were able to explore the space during the technical rehearsals, discovering new ways of moving, using the pillars, the stairs, the bars and even having to avoid the lanterns. The studio was merely a rehearsal room, but when we moved into the theatre, the space became Porto, and this became our world. In an interview, Declan Donnellan speaks of the way performances change when put in different spaces:

“It’s the superficial things that tend to change… the essence stays the same. You see through the banality and you start to discover bit by bit about what is essential.
…you get a clearer idea of what might be ‘true’ […] by seeing it in different spaces.” (Delgado, Maria M., Heritage, P., 1997, p84)

It became apparent once in the theatre that everything could be seen, there was no hiding place and it was obvious what was ‘true’ to each character, and easy to see when focus lapsed. The more we rehearsed in the space, the more we stripped away what wasn’t essential and kept what was, and the intentions of characters became purer and more clear.

While we were getting used to the new space in the technical run-throughs, we encountered difficulties with the placements of the chairs between sections, and the boundaries where we could work up to. I don’t believe there were any weaknesses in the transition from studio to theatre however; it was the right time to do so. The only problem was some people’s lack of focus and finding crucial technical rehearsals tedious. But as we got nearer the performances the lack of focus subsided and I believe we all pulled together to make a fantastic show.

3. Each performance of Porto felt very different to be a part of. I think the presence of an audience made everybody more focused, but it also altered the space, giving it another dimension, and more of a reason to escape. There was also a far stronger sense of community and conforming to the actions of the ensemble as the shows went on.

Over the three shows, the emotional content and people’s individual needs, desires and struggles became far more extreme. Things that were encountered in previous rehearsals seemed to come back in the final performances, and I think even through the shows the ‘R’ and ‘V’ stages continued. “When everything comes from the actors, what happens in performance is determined by what happens in rehearsal, and accidental discoveries are part of that”. (Callery, D., 2001, p164)

For me, there was one rehearsal when Nicola’s character reached out and I touched her hand. I had never done this before, but where I was at this point in my journey, and how I felt towards Piotr, it felt right. We brought this into the three performances, but each time the connection was more intense. In the first show she held my hand and wouldn’t let go, but by the third show she was desperately grabbing at my arm, pulling me towards her, needing my support. I felt a sort of empathy towards Nicola and it felt good to comfort her for that short time. But when she unexpectedly began hanging on to me this way, I was being drawn in against my will and was afraid, and I felt like I’d made a mistake trying to help. I wasn’t strong enough for somebody to depend on me, I needed to depend on someone else and the whole Nicola incident made me realise I needed Piotr’s character more than I initially considered. I wanted him to love and protect me, and this then made it far more hurtful when he betrayed me. In the first performance when Piotr went to open my suitcase I found it very difficult – like he was getting too close. But by the time of the third performance, with everything else that had happened, it was as though his undoing of the suitcase was the undoing of me. It was both emotionally and physically distressing, and felt as though I was unravelling.

The third and final show was very emotional for many people, whether it was because it was the last performance, or because by now characters were at their most intense. Personally for me it was a combination of both. When we exited the space for the very last time, I was overcome with a mixture of emotions: relief and happiness to finally be free, but also sadness for leaving the familiar space that had been our world for such a long time. Throughout Porto I had fought so hard against letting someone in (particularly when Piotr tried to get into my suitcase) that by the end I felt exhausted. So at the final moment when I accepted Piotr, it was a huge release for me to finally let go of the fight, putting my insecurities and uncertainties behind me. I had pushed through my personal boundaries and given myself completely to him, and the feeling was overwhelming.

Bibliography:

Callery, D., (2001) Through The Body: A Practical Guide to Physical Theatre. London: Nick Hern Books

Donnellan, D. in Delgado, M. M., Heritage, P., (1997) In Contact With The Gods?: Directors Talk Theatre. Manchester: University Press

Motionhouse Dance Theatre (About Motionhouse page) [online]. <>